Saturday, November 22, 2008

Will-power... what's that?

So, my will power is beginning to wane. I am knee deep in this diet, having mild success and I am loosing steam. My birthday is next week and all I can think about is what I am going to eat! I have allowed myself one day to enjoy all the foods I have been missing- or longing for. I really wish that I was like a certain sister-in-law I have that eats to live rather than living to eat. I am a foodie. I cannot deny it. I wish that I could be hypnotized into thinking that I do not love food. But I do! AHHHH I am so frustrated I want to scream! I had a great day to day, I exercised, ate a light lunch, lots of water, and then BAM! a spur of the moment change and I am eating peperoni pizza and oatmeal cookies (seriously forbidden). I wouldn't feel so bad if I hadn't done that same thing last night! I am like an addict. I fall off the wagon every day. I am starting to feel pretty bad about myself... even though the cookies are making me feel really nice.

Well, onto the topic of food, my birthday is starting out with an awsome blossom from Texas Roadhouse and ending with a Cinnabon. Somewhere in there I am going to Macaroni Grill for Penne rustica and I am going to eat and entire loaf of bread and some brownies. I think I will probably be in a food coma, so don't bother calling me on the 30th. But pray that I come out of this "Celebration" alive. I am hoping that I will feel so terrible that I will jump back on the wagon with renewed dedication. Or else I will have to go buy another pair of fat pants since I threw mine out today. I will keep you posted. I think I love carbs.

8 comments:

Anne said...

that sounds like the most perfect day ever! while you are in your food coma, i will fill your iv with pure chocolate goodness! :)

Chandra said...

Hahaha. Oh, Nicole. Here's my philosophy: I am much happier when I'm enjoying my food. If I have to constantly think about how many calories I'm taking in or how much fat is in it, I'm really unhappy. Besides, I feel happier when I'm not always hungry or thinking about my favorite fattening food that I can't eat.

Buffy said...

NICOLE - I was just telling Rich the other day about how I admire your dedication and strong will. You are amazing and when you set your mind to something - you do it! We are for sure coming down on the weekend of the 12th so plan on some fun times. I can't wait to see you soon.

El Jefe said...

Hey! You hit a nerve with me Harwardlicious. The Cinnabon made me smile. Heart Attack on a stick. And worth it.

Think of it this way: The guy who wrote Fit For Life does this every week. So if you are only splurging on your Birthday you are way ahead of the game.

I just had some awesome brownies by the way...

JoDee said...

Ooh, that does sound like a divine day!! And I don't think you give yourself near enough credit: you are way more disciplined than I could ever hope to be. Plus - this is like the WORST time of year to be skimping on luscious treats, isn't it? I told myself that I would start "paying attention" AFTER the holidays, and AFTER the baby comes. We'll see if I ever really do. Hang in there - and let yourself ENJOY your Birthday!!

Trish in Texas said...

Hilarious post! I have a hard time believing your will power is waning. Even if you fall off the wagon you get right back up on it again, which is more than most people can say.
Enjoy your fabulous birthday treats!
PS I love carbs, too. Does that make you feel better at all?

Jessie said...

"Eat to live, don't live to eat" runs through my thoughts about every day. I like to think I'm capable of eating to live...my parents seem to pull it off. But somewhere between their fried burritos (which they would never make now), and my grandma pushing crackers and squeezy-cheese my way at every childhood visit, I became addicted to food. Not that I've ever bought squeezy-cheese in my life, just that I like to blame it for my food woes. Sigh. 'Tis a struggle for me as well.

Good luck, Friend. You can do this!

Nicole said...

Food tally, I did eat everything on the list, but I subbed out the brownies for an oatmeal cookie, I added a strawberry Italian soda, and added popcorn at the movie, sips of a coke and a apple pie caramel apple. Yum!